Who I Am
My name isn’t really that important for this blog. If you want to call me something, call me J, or Jaybird as my sister-in-law loves to call me.
I am in my mid 20’s, married to a talented poet-soon-to-be-Dr. (the Ph.D. kind) with three kids.
Yes, they’re step kids, and my wife is slightly older than me. But really, that doesn’t matter, because as my coworker so eloquently put it, “What’s wrong with your wife? She’s at least three leagues out of yours.” I usually just chalk it up to poor taste in men and a desire to slum it with some chump like me.
By day (and night, and weekend, and holiday, and pretty much always), I am a professional firefighter and emergency medical technician for a city fire department in Texas. I won’t get more specific than that, because in the event that I ever post about work, the less specific the details the less liable I am.
As I said earlier, I’m also a dad, and a husband. On top of that, I’ll often get a wild hair up my ass that I can be something more than I am (M.D., P.A., you name it, I’ve probably thought of trying it). Not that there’s anything wrong with what I do. I love what I do. I just sometimes seem to think that I need to do more with my life. I think it stems from a mild case of Adult ADHD. I’ll come up with some hair-brained adventure and go tilting at windmills.
I love the story of Don Quixote. He may be foolish, and just a little insane. I mean honestly, the guy charges at windmills because he thinks they’re giants, all in the name of the woman he loves that he really never met. Most people look at him and see a fool on a fool’s errand. In the end, he comes to his senses and apologizes for the wrong he’s done, and settles in to his death bed a humiliated, defeated man.
What I see, though, is not a fool. What I see is a man who (with a little touch of either insanity or dementia) decides to ride into glory with honor. I see a man who can push through fear (who cares if they weren’t really giants; the man still tilted). I see a man who fought to uphold a sense of right and decency (however misguided and insane he was; hell, I love the fact that he is a little off). But mostly, I love that he tries to burn out rather than just fade away. There is glory in the struggle, and I think he knows it.
I hope I can be as brave (no matter how foolish it may be) as Don Quixote.